Last Dance with TheJoker

"And here I thought you were a strong player", uttered the old witch in seat 7. I sat in seat 10 dragging in $575 worth of Sunset Station $5 chips. I had 5c3c on a 5T5K7 board, she didn't show what she had. "That was a strong play", I said back to her. And it was. There had been a raise to $12 and 4 others, including her, called before me. The flop came down 5T5 and she led for $50. I, being the first to answer her action, called and everyone else folded. The turn brought the K and when she bet $100 I giggled inside hoping that it indeed was KT that she held in the hole. I grabbed a stack of red and then stopped, thinking about whether or not I should raise as she read me as weak. I slid 2 stacks over the line raising it another hundo. She thought for a second and my image in her mind allowed her to call. See, she's only ever seen me play squeeky tight and there was no way she could believe I held a 5 in my hand. By the way, the turn gave me a club draw. She checked the river card and I put my remaining stack of $70 in and she called. I flipped up and in her usual fashion she threw her cards with classless force towards the muck. Just shut up and send it.

It had been a long day. I sat yesterday at 3:15pm and my initial $200 buy in was lost holding the flopped nut straight. I got it in on the flop against the same straight and a flush draw. Obviously the flush draw got there and shot down the two straights. That started quite a ride for me. I ended up getting into the game for $900 (unusual for me) and then getting back to $752. It was nine hours later and I accepted a loss of $148 for the day. No big deal.

As I walked towards the car I decided to give in to a temptation I'd had for about 3 days. I sat at a Let it Ride table with a hundo. I hit a couple hands and lost a few more and then got up with $110. That would have been fine but I suppose I had one more thing to get out of my system. Little did I know that I had a date with TheJoker. For those of you who don't know, TheJoker is a very old friend/enemy from my past. It's not a human, mind you, it's more of an entity, a force if you will. ThJoker is that demon who talks to me and gets me to behave in a self-destructive manner. He's responsible for all the -EV gambling I've done in the past, but mostly the times when I couldn't afford it. Click on his name above for a more in depth description of what he is.

So anyway, TheJoker showed up last night at Sunset Station just as I left the Let it Ride table. I didn't see him at first as he lurked around the casino keeping his distance behind me. But before I knew it he was keeping his distance in front of me, luring me to that old drug. I sat at a triple play Bonus Poker machine for a bit at $3.75 a twirl. Next thing I knew I was hitting the $1 machines at $5 a twirl on a single hand. At one point I realised that I was no longer in control and just sat back and enjoyed the painful yet oh so pleasurable ride. I took dips I never intended to take and had wins between $125 and $500. I played video poker games I've never played before such as Double Joker Poker. After about 4 hours I left the casino in better shape than I could have been.

When I woke up today, I thought I was alone. Groggy, I went through my routine brushing my teeth and what not. I never saw him, but apparently, TheJoker slept over and followed me to Caesar's for the 7:00pm tourny. I shoved 14 BB's in preflop with TT, got called by Ac5c and the board came 3J324 to give the guy a wheel. As I walked from the poker room, TheJoker tapped me on the shoulder. Long story short, I was led by the hand to a $25 craps table, then to several poker machines, and then across the street to Casino Royale to feed a few of their machines.

Once it was over and the smoke cleared, I assessed the damage and realised that it wasn't that bad. I had to do it, I just had to. It had to happen and I'm glad it's over. In fact, I'm happy that I'm a different person than I used to be. God only knows what would have happened if I had won $46K 10 years ago, so a few hundred isn't anything to cry about. I know too much to get sucked into the abyss of -EV gambling. Many poker players are ruined by their own personal demons. I plan to continue down the poker path and stay out of the pit. I don't even enjoy table games anymore. I look at them and all I see is lose, lose, lose. As for video poker, I may get on the right side of that game in the future, but for now, I'm staying away.

And as for TheJoker, well, he lives on. After one last dance, I sent him away for now and hopefully, not to sound contridictory to my previous statements, he'll stay away for a long time. I don't believe he can be killed, but he can be sent packing like a filthy whore the next morning. Too bad I took him out for breakfast first.